My Heart is Full for Christmas

For the first time ever, I didn't spend Christmas Day in Manitoba or with my family. I wasn't sure if I was going to like it or not. Because I changed jobs a couple of months ago I had to work on Christmas Eve and Boxing Day. There wasn't time to head back to my home province.

It turns out I had a pretty good day.

I had breakfast at friends. It's always nice to be included. I FaceTimed with my parents, and received a whole bunch of messages and texts from people wishing me all the best of the season.

All in all, Christmas left me with the best gift of them all. I have an overwhelming feeling of optimism. I think 2014 is going to be a great year for the world and for me personally. I don't know what it's going to look like but I know the people who choose to be around me are great people. I know that there will always someone to lend a bit of support when I hit bumps in the road and that fills my heart.

My life isn't perfect, in fact it's not exactly what I want it to look like at the moment. I am ok with that. I have come to terms with twists and turns, in fact, I welcome them. It makes life interesting, especially when you know great people will be around you and check in from time to time.

I got some very thoughtful presents but this overwhelming feeling of optimism about where things are going is a wave worth riding as far as I can. A year ago I wasn't feeling too excited about the future but now I can't wait for whatever is next and that's a great place to be.

I hope everyone who reads this takes some time to reflect and count up all the good things that you have in your life because you probably have more than you realize and it will probably give you a very optimistic outlook.

The Shortest Day of the Year

Today is the first day of winter so in the northern hemisphere we have the least amount of daylight. As a person who loves a bright sunny day this is not my favourite day of the year. Thankfully the holidays make you so busy that you don't really notice how little the sun is up. The hard part is getting through the first part of January. At least we have turned the corner and there will be more daylight everyday for the next year.

It has snowed a lot in Ottawa this year and it's stayed cold enough that it is sticking around. There will not be a lot of sunlight to warm things up and melt the snow so its best to find ways to enjoy it.

Snow can make for beautiful photos, especially in the sunshine.

Snow means you can ski, or toboggan, or build a snowman.

Snow can be mesmerizing, especially the big fluffy flakes when the sun is low in the sky.

I will admit that winter is my least favourite season but there are still some really cool things about it. The way things are going we may have a very long season on the Rideau Canal, which I must admit is a great place to go on a winter day.

The climb out of the cold darkness of winter to the re-birth of spring is exciting and unpredictable. It takes two steps forward and three back. It's always something to talk about and on the first day that really feels like spring, it's a moment everyone will enjoy every year.

Today is the shortest day of the year but that only means that good things are coming our way, and as long as there are good things coming, we have a great reason to get up and seize the day.

My Not So Perfect Life

Yesterday I stumbled on a really interesting blog called Confessions of an Imperfect Life written by Katie Devine. She's in her mid-thirties and her life looks nothing like what she thought it would. It got me thinking a bit.

My life is not anywhere near perfect.

I'm about to turn 37 and I'm no where near getting married. I walked away from a good paying job because I felt really trapped. I'm pretty sure I'm having a mid-life crisis.

All that being said, I wouldn't trade my life in.

Once upon a time I had a job I really liked. I was excited to get up on Monday morning and go to work. I eventually out grew that job and moved up. I left that job and I feel free. I don't love what I do these days but I have rediscovered what it's like to feel free and I will not trade this feeling.

As I often tell one of my friends, when we are old and sitting around at the Legion we are going to talk about this moment. My life is full of stuff like that. Some of them are big moments, some of them are small moments but they are all noteworthy moments.

I don't know where my life is going and in a way I really don't care. It's ok to not have a plan. It's ok not to know the future. It's ok to wake up and say maybe today everything is going to take a big left turn or maybe it won't. I'm liking that about my life.

I've lost over 30 pounds in the last year. It helped me realize that I can shape my life to what I want. It reinforced that I have control of my life and if I want to change it I can. That's really exciting.

My life is not perfect but nobody's is and I wouldn't trade my imperfect life full of great friends, wonderful family, and epic moments for anyone else's. 

Maybe It's a Mid-Life Crisis

As I have written about several times, I have recently changed jobs. I had to. I felt trapped but now I feel like there is something out there that I'm going to thrive at. The problem is, I have no idea what that may be.

There are good and bad points to any job or career. We all know that. There are some parts of the new job I really like and there are parts I would gladly do without. So not surprisingly, with this new found feeling of freedom I wonder what else is out there.

A couple of days ago I thought to myself, hmmmm, maybe I should be a truck driver. It's different and it would have an element of adventure but it also would keep me from talking to people all day. As such, it is probably not the best choice in the end. 

The truck driver thought made me realize that I don't know what I want my life to look like for the next twenty years, which brought on the mid-life crisis thought.

If you don't know what you want, it's hard to get there. I have been feeling like a bit of a scalar lately. I have lots of energy and drive but I don't know where I should be directing it. I don't know if I want a large or small organization. I don't know if I want to start something new. I really don't know.

Now the one huge upside to not knowing where you want to be is a many courses of action are open to consideration.

I'll figure it all out. I'll get headed to where I should be. In the meantime, I'm learning and growing, which in the end, is probably the most important thing in life, at least to a guy like me.

You May Be Judged

I really believe in free speech. You can say whatever you want. It doesn't bother me. However, I will judge you for what you say.

I was witness to a conversation today that made me take note. It was about Christmas. One of the parties to the conversation was arguing that we shouldn't be having things like NBA basketball games on Christmas Day because it will prevent a lot of people from being with their families on that special day.

I see his point.

However, this person is also a member of the senior management of a for profit organization that was open the minute the law allowed for on Remembrance Day.

I'm a firm believer that we should take one whole day each year to remember and thank those who gave up so much so we could have choice in our life. How does it often fall to the wayside for people to show respect for ordinary people who committed to a cause and faced  evil forces to ensure the future would be bright.

I didn't speak up this time. I wanted to see where the whole argument would go. This is definitely a case of actions speaking a lot louder than words. Preventing people from being able to show their thanks and support for the few that did so much is very unfortunate. What is even unfortunate is people don't have the depth to realize that they do not approach each situation with the same moral compass.

He was right, it is important to have families together for Christmas and if at all possible employers should facilitate this. Most families do get at least a couple of days a year that they can spend together, I only ask for one whole day to remember and say thanks for our precious freedom.

I Knew It Would Happen

A month ago I changed jobs. I feel a lot freer but there is one thing I knew I would miss. When I moved to Ottawa, I found a place to live within walking distance of work. Everyday I would walk a little over two and a half kilometres to get to work in the morning and another two and a half kilometres to get home. Once I got used to it, it really helped with other parts of life.

I miss walking to work.

I'm starting to notice the effects of not walking to work. I think I've lost a bit of my cardiovascular strength and endurance. I am a bit slower when I run and the last couple of reps of the last set at the gym are more difficult. Going into winter, I'm not too fond of this.

One of the main reasons I switched jobs was I wasn't enjoying my job. I felt trapped. I can't imagine how bad it would have been if I had not been walking to work each day.

Walking does a lot to help reduce stress. It forces you to be outside. It makes you feel more connected with the city in which you live. It gives you some exercise.

I may never live walking distance to work again and that's a shame. If you have the opportunity to live close enough to your job that you can walk, I suggest you take advantage of it. You will not be sorry. It will improve your life.

If, in the future, I have another opportunity to walk to work, I will put it back in my lifestyle. My life improved significantly when I moved to Ottawa three years ago and one of the best enhancements was walking to work, even if I don't currently do it.

It's a Rush

I have now been selling cars for a bit over three weeks. At this point I'm not the best car salesman that walked on this life supporting sphere that flies through a vacuum around a gaseous ball of fire but, I'm doing ok. With each deal I make, I learn a bit more. However, I must admit, I get a rush when I'm doing a deal.

I like the feeling I get when I close a deal.

I'm not going to lie, sales is a tough racket. You get what you put into it and not everyone has the intestinal fortitude to deal with all the rejection but if you are willing to slug it out, you can can get a really good feeling from selling cars.

There are a lot of unscrupulous people in the car business. Some of the people I've met are not worth my time. However, if you do this for any amount of time, you can sell cars. It may be the only thing you are good at, but you can get really good at it.

Most of my friends thought I was crazy to sell cars for a living. As I write this I don't know if I will do this for a long time but I know that when I'm doing a deal, I get a rush. I get excited. I get caught up in the moment and I like that feeling. I can see how people end up doing this for a long time. You have a lot of control over your performance. You have direct control over what you take home and, if you are like me, you get a big rush from selling cars.

If I do a deal in the evening, I will have trouble sleeping at night. I'll be buzzing for hours from a rush. Living life hopped up on adrenaline is a good way to be and I'm doing it.

If the rush starts to disappear, I will have to move on because I'm not going to live a mediocre life, but as it goes for now, I will live a life full of rushes from selling.

Scandal!

Canada does not have a huge population and we are generally seen by the rest of the world as very polite. We say please and thank-you. We hold the door for you. We try are best to not rock the boat.

However, all of a sudden we seem to be up to our eyeballs in scandals.

The headline that is most prominent is Rob Ford, Mayor of Toronto admitted to smoking crack cocaine. He isn't the first North American mayor to smoke crack and I doubt he will be the last. 

On the same day, the Canadian Senate has suspended three, yes the number that lies between two and four, of its own members without pay because of improperly filed expense claims. If you are reading this and you are not familiar with Canadian Parliamentary rules, Senators are appointed and may serve continuously until the age of seventy-five. It used to be for life but they changed it a while back. The Senate generally stays out of the spotlight and you can quietly go about your daily life without scrutiny. Before this the Senate had never suspended anyone without pay. This is a big leap.

In Montreal, the mayor stepped down amongst corruption allegations and soon after his appointed replacement was arrested.

In Winnipeg, there are projects that were not tendered according to the rules, a shady looking land swap deal and even a City Hall Christmas party grabbing headlines. Everyone is pointing to the mayor on that one as well.

What happened?

In my mind there are two possibilities. Either Canadian forgot how to keep their secrets or we have have developed an edge we never had.

With the absolute ease to record and share information it is a lot easier to track what people say and do. It is very hard to deny a statement or limit it's exposure. Once something is on the internet and interesting it can go viral and it becomes part of the collective consciousness, at least for a while. Secrets are not as prevalent as they used to be.

However, I think Canadians are becoming bolder. I think we are willing to take more chances for the big payoff, leaving us exposed to big failure. Our politicians may not have the public's interest at the heart of everything they do. Everyone, including Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper, want to be seen as an outsider who is fighting the establishment. If  the Prime Minister doesn't se himself as the establishment, who is?

We need to shake the establishment from time to time. We need to hold people accountable for the responsibilities bestowed upon them. We don't need this much scandal. Too much time and effort is being put into fixing the problems and not improving the lives of Canadians.

So, to all the people in charge of anything established by the people for the people, get your house in order, right now. We don't need this. There are real problems that need to be solved and let's be honest, Canadians are better than this.

No Coke for 150 Days

Yesterday was my one-hundred fiftieth day without drinking any Coca-Cola. I am so happy I have made this change in my life. There is no other way to describe that stuff other than pure evil. I don't think there is a beverage on this planet that tastes that good but is so unbelievably bad for you.

Here are the facts.

With no other significant change in my life I have lost twenty-four pounds. I will admit I have been running a bit but it averages less than 5 kilometres per week so I truly doubt it has any real impact on my weight. Since changing jobs I don't walk over five kilometres each workday to get to work and back but, I am on my feet a lot more at my new job than I was at the old one. So, I have to postulate that my change from two-hundred twenty-one pounds to one-hundred ninety-seven pounds is directly related to cutting Coke out of my life.

When I was drinking Coke, pants with a 36 waist fit properly. Since then I needed to buy smaller pants so I went down to 34 waist pants. Now those are starting to be a bit loose. I don't think I'm there yet but I may even have to step down to 32 waist pants. There are two factors at play here. First, if you lose twenty-four pounds, your waist will inevitably get smaller. The weight has to come from somewhere and if we have extra weight, it tends to collect around your waist. Secondly, I don't feel bloated from the carbonation anymore and I think my waist is smaller because of it.

As we get deeper in the fall in Eastern Ontario, I am feeling the cool days more than I used to. I'm sure this is because I'm a lot leaner than I've been for most of my adult life. 

A lot of people, and I mean a lot, have commented. I look noticeably different. It's a good feeling to receive so much positive feedback. It usually takes a significant change for most people to say something so there must be a big difference.

I have a lot more energy. My body is no longer relying on the sugar and caffeine to run so I don't get crashes like I used to. I don't get a headache if my routine is upset and I can adapt a lot better to change. I also sleep a lot better as my system isn't full of garbage that is trying to keep me awake.

Overall, I am very happy that I quit drinking Coke. I'm not going to lie, there are days I miss the taste but that feeling always passes and when I step on the scale, look in the mirror, or wake up from a good sleep I always think it's worth not tasting it for that momentary enjoyment.

Feeling Free

I've been selling cars for a couple of weeks now. Some of the job I really like, some of it I'm really not a fan of. The job is pretty much as I expected it to be. This post isn't about selling cars, it's about what the world feels like now.

I worked in the same program for the same organization for a long time. I'll be honest, some of it was very comfortable. I knew what to do, and who to talk to. However, I also felt really trapped. Based on sheer numbers promotion was unlikely for a long time. A lateral transfer was also not in the cards for the foreseeable future, not because I couldn't do another job but because everyone else I could switch with didn't have the technical skills and knowledge to do my job. It's not their fault, what I was doing was very specialized.

Since switching jobs, I feel free. 

When talking to various people about how it's going, I have come to realize the world is once again open to me. In the long term, I may not like selling cars, it's too early to judge. However, I feel like if I don't I will find something I do like. I have a lot of skills and knowledge. I am adding some new experience and I believe it will be compliment my current skills. All of this gives me a feeling of freedom.

I feel like I can live wherever I want. Right now I want to live in Ottawa. So, I can work at something I like in this city. If an opportunity elsewhere interests me, I can make a switch. I feel I can have a balance between my work and my my out of work life.

I feel like I can do whatever I want. If I choose to change occupations it may take some time but I can find what I want to do. I can find an organization that closely aligns with how I feel business is to be conducted. I feel I can find an organization that values my inputs and bring value to them. I was bogging down in the churn in my old job. That is gone and I hope to never experience it again.

There was a time in my life when I used to seek out adventure. That diminished in recent years and I am getting it back. It's invigorating. I feel a lot more alive and I'm viewing the world with excitement and optimism. I feel more creative and I'm learning everyday. I'm returning to the person I like and want to be.

I have no regrets with my old job. I thoroughly enjoyed it most of the time. I grew as a person and I had some amazing experiences but it was time for the next chapter in my life and since I've done what some people think is crazy, I feel I have put my life on a great course to something big in the future. That's what I'm most excited about.

Broad Strokes

Having a university degree is extremely valuable. Not only does it give you skills, knowledge, and ability it also gives you access to other educated people. When you basically live amongst educated people you can forget that not everyone lives the same life.

My recent job change to has re-opened my eyes to the value of education.

This is not a criticism of the people I work with or the customers I serve. It is a comment on how we can forget that not everyone lives the same life, which is a good thing.

Educated people are generally not drawn to sell cars. The pay is not guaranteed, the hours can be long, especially in the beginning, and it can be frustrating. However, those who sell cars for a long time get very good at it. Admittedly, there are some traits that most people successful in car sales possess. They like to talk. They are not shy. They like to hunt and chase. They have thick skin.

For all the good qualities they have, they don't generally have a lot of education. Car salesmen do not sit around and discuss the impact of population density on public transport and retail economic activity.

That conversation would have happened at lunch in the old job, not in the new one. There have already been several comments on the 'big words' that I often use. I don't think my language is too complex but I have to consider the audience. It isn't normal for them to hear so it is unique to them. This is ok, and sometimes refreshing. I do admit that I like to be accurate and efficient when I communicate. A larger vocabulary will help with that. If you can say more with fewer words, you can get more done.

An expanded vocabulary come from education. The same education also provides insight and context in many situations The more you know about how the world interacts with itself, the more you can predict how things will happen and control the situation. If you understand what it takes to get something done, you can adapt the situation to have things set up so it seems to move naturally.

I am currently in learning mode, trying to figure out a new work environment, in a new industry, with a new organization. Once I know how things really work, I should be able to use my education and previous experience to perform at a very high level. it will take time, it will take hard work, but most of all it will take the ability to see the world through educated eyes.

There are a a lot of great people in this world. Some went to university, some learned through experience, and some a combination of the two. I hope to be the one of the guys with the combination of experience and education, because that's when you can really make a difference.

The New Job

As I had mentioned earlier, I have ended my full time employment within the Cadet Program. For me, it's time to get back to the parts of the program where the good is actually happening. However, I am not independently wealthy so I need a way to make money to buy food and shelter. So, I have started a sales position with Southbank Dodge in Ottawa.

I'm really new to selling cars and I haven't been working in a for profit organization for over a decade, so far, it's going ok.

I'm not going to sugar coat this is any way. Selling cars is pretty much what it seems. I really can't comment too much on it yet, I haven't learned enough to do that. What I can tell you is this is not for everyone. It is a performance based job, it is all about dealing with people, and not everyone is going to do well at it. For me it's way too early to determine if I have what it takes. I understand sales and I know how to communicate, that still doesn't mean I'm going to be successful. What I've figured out so far is like most things you will get out of it what you put into it. If you put in the effort and don't make too many mistakes, you should be ok. There must be a living to be made selling cars or people wouldn't do it for years.

After doing some training most of my first day on Friday I somehow managed to sell 3 cars on Saturday. There was a lot of help from the sales managers but I think they see I'm serious and will take the time with me now. At least I hope that's the case. However, I've only sold 3 cars so I haven't proven anything yet. I need to drive my own customer traffic, I need to do a good job of finding the right vehicle for each customer, but most of all I need to learn a lot.

This is a big change from what I've been doing for the last 11 1/2 years. I'm not even sure if there is a procedures manual for this job, never mind the myriad of rules that go with military life.

I don't know if this is for me but I know it's different and that should keep me going until I do know. If nothing else, at least I wasn't scared to make a change.

30 House Parties in 30 Days

I was at The Laff on Saturday for The Lucky Ron Show, those who know me are not surprised by this at all. Lucky announced they are firing up the '30 House Parties in 30 Days' which hasn't been done since 1999. I thought since I had no work commitments on Wednesday it would be perfect to get in on this, so I booked it.

It was so much fun.

I rounded up some friends, picked up some beer and Lucky Ron showed up and played in my living room. It was The Lucky Ron Show, he told the same jokes, sang the same songs, we yelled "Number Four!" after the third song, and threw cigarettes into his guitar during Tilsonburg. 

I wouldn't do it every night but it is something unique to do once a decade, if for no other reason that you can. There wasn't too much foot stomping, my downstairs neighbour didn't complain but there was a lot of singing along, clapping, laughing, and a good old time. There were two people who had never seen the show before and somehow it still worked out to 86% new people.

As I move on in life and get older the one thing that seems to keep happening is I find unique adventures, having the Rocky Horror Pictures Show of One Man Country acts play in your living room qualifies as unique. 

If you are in the Ottawa area I suggest if you have never seen The Lucky Ron Show head down to The Laff and check it out. If you are a fan of Lucky Ron I suggest you get ahold of him and have him play one of these thirty house parties at your place, it's one of the few things you know will be fun every time even if it is the same show every week, nothing new or different.

Really??

I Had one of those moments that I just can't seem to forget. It was a week ago Saturday. That part isn't important other than to illustrate how much this actually bothers me.

It had been a busy day and I was finally done everything I wanted to get done that day. I was going to catch Lucky Ron, as I do many Saturdays. I needed some cash, luckily I was going to walk right past a branch from my bank, so I could just pop in and grab some money, and then carry on. As I approached the bank I caught up to two guys in their twenties. They too were headed into the same bank. I admit I walk faster than most people, partly because I walk so much, on this rainy day, I was going faster than them. This didn't bother me. What got my blood boiling was they were too lazy to manually open the door. They instead chose to press the button for the automatic door, as if they had some sort of mobility issue and waited as the door slowly opened.

I know it only delayed me by about ten seconds but really?

I was so annoyed I actually spoke up and said, "Really, really, are you that lazy?"

I wasn't so bothered that they wasted ten seconds of my life, I was bothered that it has become acceptable for people to take the easy way out of a simple routine task that should be so tasking that you are looking for an easy way out.

I understand why you want automatic doors. For various reasons people have mobility challenges and not having to deal with the door makes a building much more accessible. I don't think it was ever really intended for able bodied men to use because they are too lazy to open a door.

At least I hope it was just because they were too lazy because if opening a door is too demanding, we have a whole different issue on our hands.

It shouldn't bother me that others don't want to be better but it does. It reflects poorly on society. It isn't limited to twenty-somethings. I see a lot of people of all ages that are not taking control of their well-being. They are allowing themselves to live in a state that prevents them from enjoying life as much as they should. As a result, they feel it is too much effort to open a door.

In North America too many people are not living healthy. Children do not have good examples of healthy and active living. They have almost no chance to do better because for many it appears unreachable or too much work. Active people know the opposite is true and if you you get a lot more out than you put in. However, if your parents to live well, and their friends don't live well then what chance does a child have and they feel the need to use the button to open a door instead of doing a task that should be effortless to most.

Organized Run

I have several friends who have entered running events. At various times I have asked why they would pay money to go and run if you have no real chance of winning. It made sense to pay to play hockey or baseball but running never really made sense.

I was convinced to enter the 5K of the Canada Army Run. Last week-end was the race and I now have a better understanding of it.

I think the first benefit of entering a run is it gives you a goal to train for. It gets you going and helps you gauge your progress. There's a reason for lacing up your shoes and heading out in the heat or the rain and running until you can produce a puddle of your own sweat. 

Race day is exciting. There are people everywhere. There are people warming up. There are people stretching. As people load into their respective corrals, the biomass grows. The gun goes off and you are running. Now the race day factor cuts in and you can do more than usual. As far as I know, until last Sunday, I had never run continuously for five kilometres. Now I can say I have. I ran the whole length in a time of 30'31". I'm pleased with that time. I figured if I ran the whole length, I would be between 30 and 31 minutes. The people cheering you on is also up-lifting. I didn't realize it would help as much as it did.

I am probably not going to run a 5K every month like some people do but I will do it from time to time and I will continue to run as part of my exercise regime. I have to say this is an example of you don't know what it's like until you try it. My life is better because I did.

Change is Coming

What have I done this time? I often write about how I see the world unfolding. This time it's all about me.

In 1989 when my family moved back to Russell, Manitoba I joined 677 Russell, Royal Canadian Air Cadet Squadron. After six years as a cadet and doing most of the most amazing activities the program has to offer, it was time to stop being a cadet. I really wanted to give back to the program and keep flying so I enrolled in the CIC. After about 6 years I ended up working full time as a CIC officer. A couple of promotions later and a posting to Ottawa, this amazing ride is going to take another change. I'm going back to part time service.

There are a lot of reasons I decided to change how I earn a living but the biggest is it's time.

I have been involved in the Air Cadet Program for 24 years. I'm not sure how much longer I could sit at a desk and do headquarters type work without starting to become jaded so I'm not going to let it happen. I can now get back to why I decided to stay involved in the program after being a cadet and that is to give back to youth in Canada. It's a chance to be one of the guys and not be worried about they myriad of issues that come with any full time job. It's a chance to help people develop and show them the best way to use the system. It's a chance to be able to express my opinion without it being confused with policy. It's a chance to show people how to use the structure to affect change. It's a chance to explain why things work and prepare them to be adults that make an impact.

I do not regret taking a full time job or coming to Ottawa. In fact, I may very well live here the rest of my life. I have unique experience and can use that to make things better at the grassroots level. I can be excited to go flying again. 

It's going to be different but it's also going to be amazing. I'm excited about how much I can do and the opportunities that may come.

The Running Adventure Continues

My foray into the world of running has not been the smoothest transition. It's not an abject failure but I'm sure many others have had an easier transition. I have not quit, in fact I have gone for 3 runs this week. They are not long runs but they are making a difference.

I did do something to my knee a bit over a month ago which left me limping for a few days and unable to run for sixteen days. Once I thought my knee was good to go, I got back at it. Needless to say the knee wasn't quite ready and that kept me to a walking pace for another twelve days. The second time I restarted this journey I put a brace on the suspect knee and things have been good ever since.

This new activity is in addition to all my current activity. I'm still walking to work everyday. I'm still in the gym three times a week and I still do everything I was doing before. My body has kindly informed me that I have added to my fitness regime and not substituted one activity for another. My endurance is slowly improving and my legs are screaming at me to give them a break. Now that I have found a pace I can just keep going as long as I want, it is simply mind over matter.

I originally took on running because I was convinced by a friend to run the 5km in the Army Run but I have since started to see it as a long term activity. There are a few upsides to running. You can basically run anywhere. It's great exercise and makes all your other exercises easier in the long run as your heart and lungs can get more oxygen to your hard working muscles. It can be scenic. Like all exercise, it helps control stress and makes sleeping much more rewarding. People are generally impressed by the fact that you are going for a run.

It's been nearly ten years since I started to exercise regularly and as I look back I'm happy with my choice to live an active life. It has made so much in my life better. The one take-away I have from this all is, it isn't important what you do, its important that you are doing something regularly.

Innovation

Yesterday I read this article from the Ottawa Citizen describing a very exciting and innovative  project that may bring electricity to many parts of the world that currently is not served. I found this very exciting because the implications could be far reaching. I have been thinking about it and the possibilities for other innovation throughout the world.

Now don't get me wrong. I like my first world stuff. I like my iPhone, and my big screen TV. Without unique thinking none of these items would exist. However, I think the unique challenges of the developing world, especially in rural areas provide the biggest opportunities for innovation.

Sitting in my high-rise apartment in Ottawa, I take a lot for granted. I have reliable energy to provide heat, cooling, light, refrigeration, information, sanitation, and entertainment. It's a very nice way to live. In much of the world some or all of these comforts are not available or reliable. This results in challenges. 

However, what if we can improve the infrastructure in under-developed areas? What if we can start to provide the affordable access to resources that the developed world enjoys? It can give many people new opportunities to provide for their families. It can open new markets in both directions. It can introduce new talent into the global marketplace. The only thing we have to do is put in the the time, effort, and resources. We need to look at what is not there and how do we get it in. We need to use local and scalable solutions and we need to do it now.

This is a great opportunity for investment. There are billion dollar ideas waiting to be developed and implemented. The markets will evolve. Moving a family from two dollars a day to ten dollars a day is a five-hundred percent increase in income. There are a lot of families in this category and it will have a huge impact on global buying power. More money will be moving and more people will be earning. Improved infrastructure will make it easier for new money to move into under-developed regions. Rural economies will have more opportunities to get goods or services out to move more money in. Everyone wins.

I have often said the best social programs are a good stable job. Most people want to be self-sufficient. The standard of living of a region can only improve if goods or services are flowing out, otherwise the money is just going around in a circle. Opportunities like what is presented in the article will help this.

If you can design things, consider making something to change a community a long way away. If you can invest, consider investing in these types of activities. It will make a big difference for a lot of people in a lot of places.

Understand

I've been thinking a lot about how to get things done. It isn't always easy as there are always roadblocks. One of the biggest impediments is people not sharing the same views as you. It can be frustrating but it is also a reality. I have often been able to build consensus. For a long time I couldn't understand how I was getting it done. With some reflection, I think I know what I've been doing.

Everyone believes what they believe for a reason. It is relatively easy to understand what someone believes. They will probably tell you the what, even if you don't want to know. To make any headway you must understand why they believe what they believe. You need to understand what teaching, experience, legend, myth, book, movie, or conversation makes them hold that belief.

However, all that doesn't mean you have to accept what they are saying. They can still be flat out wrong but if you understand why they believe what they do, you can attack the foundation and change their mind. It is only possible if you really understand what is driving their thought process.

Their is also a flip side. If you can make somebody else understand why you believe what you do, it can help change their mind. This is a much tougher route to follow as you are not working with your subject's values and beliefs but it will help them see why you are holding your ground.

Most people tend to stop digging once they know what their subject believes. This is only half the battle and will not lead to the desired results but understanding the why will. You don't have to like why they believe what they believe, you don't have to agree with what they believe but if you understand why they think like they do you can begin to build a bridge and change their thinking.

Running Away

It's no secret I have never been a fan of running. I think there is a couple of reasons for this. 

First, I don't have a classic runner's body. I have broad shoulders and notoriously short legs. It's not the frame of a guy who is going to pick up running.

Second, I have never had a real reason to head out and just run.

A while back I was talked into signing up for the 5K in the Army Run. I'm pretty sure I could have just showed up and ran it but if you are going to do something, you should do it right. So, I have started running.

Now, with any new venture there will be some bumps in the road. The first couple of runs were in the early afternoon. It was when I had time. If you have not been running regularly, taking off for a run in Eastern Ontario or Southern Quebec in the hottest part of the day in July is not recommended. It wasn't so much that I had been gassed, I felt like overheating was imminent. Check. Lesson learned.

The next attempt was early in the morning. It was a great improvement. I wan't going to be standing in a puddle of my own sweat at the end of the run. I was thinking I had it figured out. Then I realized I had made a bit of an error. The night before I ate some spicy Italian sausage. I'll save you the gory details but lets just say it was rather critical that I slow down or bad things were going to happen. Check. Lesson learned.

Yesterday, I went again. Like the last run it was early in the morning so I didn't overheat. Again it wasn't perfect but I have sorted some of it out. My biggest problem now is trying to keep myself slowed down so I run a steady pace. This will take a few runs to get it sorted out but I'm getting there. 

I think after giving up Coca-Cola which has resulted in losing thirteen pounds and having to buy smaller pants and walking to work since moving to Ottawa, running is a natural extension. I have been exercising regularly for almost a decade but I always avoided running. Not any more.

I doubt you will ever hear of me running a marathon. It's not on my horizon at this time. If you want to run one, giver but it's not my goal. I see running as a compliment to my existing fitness routine.

I'll provide an update when I'm further into this new adventure. For now I'm hoping for a couple of runs a week while I figure out what a good pace is and a decent performance in the Army Run. It can only serve to improve my fitness and that is never a bad thing.

Distinct

I'm back in Quebec for another week of flying. Overall it's rather enjoyable. However, there are some quirks about this province that go well beyond the language.

My first example. I was at the bank, specifically the cash machine to get some money. A bid diesel burning jacked up truck straight out of Fort Mac pulled up beside me. The only think missing were the truck nuts. I thought I wasn't in Alberta and I was right because, the driver grabbed his man purse, that's right a murse, and went in to get money. This could not be mistaken as a satchel like what Indiana Jones would carry. There was no mistaking this for a man's purse.

Only in Quebec.

My second example. I was driving along and I caught up to a scooter with two people on it. It wasn't two girls it was a girl and a guy and the guy wasn't driving. Scooters are fun to ride until your friends find out but I know a lot of people that wouldn't be caught dead riding a scooter, never mind being the passenger on the back. However, there it was, right out in broad daylight.

Only in Quebec.

Don't get me wrong, there are a lot of nice people I know that live in Quebec and I almost always have fun when I visit. If the taxes were a bit more reasonable I would even consider living in Montreal. The province just has a few quirks. They may make it charming, maybe it could be called annoying but I can say for certain it is distinct.

Reality Distortion Field

I started reading for pleasure again. I hadn't read a book to entertain myself for about a year and a half. That's much too long.being a fan of Apple products it was inevitable that I would get around to reading The biography of Steve Jobs.

This isn't a book review.

There is no doubt the guy was a little crazy but he had a mission to make great products. He wanted them to look great, work great, and feel great. I think he succeeded most of the time. There can always be enhancements and as new technologies become affordable we will see more improvements but overall I think he did well in that regard.

Steve Jobs was a bit of a dreamer. He wouldn't have been successful if he didn't have Steve Wozniak by his side to make the dreams tangible. It was important that he had a very talented tech guy to make it happen in the beginning. Jobs could dream it up and figure out how to sell it. He demanded that it was built right and looked great. Woz figured out how to make it work. He was ahead of his time and could develop new products. Woz wasn't always there and wasn't a top level player very much but he helped. Ate the first product that launched it all, changed the world, and started the cash flow. Every great idea man needs a Woz to get him going.

I don't want to be Steve Jobs. He was brilliant and could get more out of people than they ever realized was possible. He could design products that people didn't know they needed. If he was going to do something he was going to do it right. These are all admirable but he was a bit of a tyrant, he would berate people and lacked basic social skills. That part I'm not so impressed with.

A big part of his magic was his reality distortion field. He could just make you believe the world was as he wanted it to be.

I don't think the Steve Jobs model will produce very many successful CEOs but I think it does prove that if you believe in yourself, are true to what you believe in and don't try to fit someone else's mold, you will be great in the world and a happy person.

Air Conditioning

It was not a wonderful spring in the Montreal-Ottawa corridor. There were several cool days with a lot of rain. As the school age children wrapped up their studies we have fallen into a hot summer. This is the typical weather for the area including it not cooling down at night.


I am lucky, my apartment is air conditioned and it is hooked into the thermostat. My home stays comfortable all summer long. It's great to get home and the place is cool. I can even cook with very little impact on my comfort.


There is a bit of a problem.


I have been in St Jean sur Richileau since the last day of June. The dorm room I have been assigned is not air conditioned. It is hot at night. It has re-energized my respect for a well climate controlled living space.


I'll admit I don't love scorching heat and high humidity but it isn't all that bad if you return to a cool dry space at the end of your day. It gives you a chance to unwind and relax. the heat won't be the reason you don't sleep so well at night.

It's Quaint

I've been in Prince Edward Island for last five days. It's a really nice place with really nice people. Before I go much further, I should mention this is not my first trip to The Island. I should also mention that I like busy cities. That being said, I really enjoyed my time. As part of what I was doing we did some tourist type stuff. 

Only in PEI would you go to a potato farm. This wasn't just any potato farm, the owner of the farm was also in a Frito-Lays commercial. It was the one where they pass a bag of chips across Canada, he's the last one to get the bag. His farm is fully automated to the point that you don't need to be in the tractor while it drives the field doing what it does. Really amazing, if you ask me.

I also ate lobster and raw oysters.This is not the first time I have had either of them but let me leave you with a piece of advice. If you haven't had any shellfish in a while, don't start with eight raw oysters. It was very tasty and it all stayed down but it wasn't without consequences. However, when you are travelling, you need to take in the local activities. The lobster, as always was great. I can't get too much lobster. I can't believe that at one time only the poorest of the poor ate lobster in Newfoundland.

People in PEI drive differently. They will stop for you no matter where you are and they are not in a rush. It's a big change from any big city. However, if you are not used to it, things are happening that you don't expect.

Overall, PEI is very quaint but the people seem really content with life. They always want to chat and will always make time for you. As well, they are a lot of fun, even if it is a bit slower pace.

Random Compliments

I like to compliment people. I probably don't do it as often as I should. As I witnessed yesterday a compliment can make you feel really good.

I was at the gym yesterday morning, doing my thing as I often do. It was nearing the end of my workout and I was riding the exercise bike while I sweated up a storm. A random guy hopped on the bike next to me and tapped me on the arm to get my attention. The following is the conversation.

Random Guy: Did you used to go to Goodlife at Rideau Centre?
Me: Yes. (At this point I'm expecting a question about why I switched.)
Random Guy: Wow, you've shredded a lot of weight. Good job.
Me: Thanks.
Random Guy: How much have you lost?
Me: About 20 pounds. (In all honesty, I don't know when he was comparing it to but I have lost 10 pounds since Christmas and 30 since moving to Ottawa so I figured 20 was a good middle ground)
Random Guy: I barely recognized you, not that I was stalking or everything, good job, keep it up.
Me: Thanks.

You may be thinking this was some creepy dude. Maybe he was but if you don't regularly use a gym for your fitness activities there are a couple of things you should know. 

First, exercising is not the most mentally stimulating activity so a lot of people tend to people watch at the gym while they work out. 

Second, if you go regularly at the same time, you will tend to see the same people over and over again.

If you combine the two you watch the same people over and over again as you try to get into shape.

Now, to have a random stranger compliment you is awesome. For you to do something to a level that someone you don't know and will never get anything from you to feel the need to speak up and say something is extremely motivating. I was shocked it happened to me.

So, when you are out and about and you see someone do something that impresses you, throw them a compliment. It costs you nothing and will make their day better. If everyone passed more compliments the world would be a better place.

No Coke

I love Coca-Cola. I can't deny how much I enjoy drinking it. I like it so much I even have a preferred way to drink it. Warm Coke poured out of a glass bottle over ice in a glass drinking vessel is the best way to enjoy it. Nothing beats it. I also marvel about how well Coke is designed. It is the only drink I know of that won't quench your thirst but leaves you satisfied and wanting more no matter how much you drink.

Unfortunately, as of late, I have been drinking way too much Coca-Cola. 

A week ago I came to terms with this and decided I needed to stop. Let's be honest, there is nothing good about drinking Coke. A 12 oz (355 ml) can has about 10 teaspoons of sugar in it. Considering I was drinking more than a litre every day and more than two litres on many days, I was putting a lot into my body that it doesn't need. In fact, I was consuming between 5000 and 6000 Calories from Coke a week. Yes, you read that right, five-thousand to six-thousands Calories. Who needs that? I know I don't, at least not from a soft-drink.

So, while drinking Coke on my couch last Thursday I decided it was time for action. It helps that a friend pointed out my great weakness for Coke which helped with the motivation.

My plan was to start a Coke free life on Monday. I figured at some point during the week-end I would give in and drink some. It turns out I got though the week-end without any Coke. That doesn't mean there wasn't a headache or two along the way. 

As the work week started, I managed to not buy any for lunch as I had been for years. This was more of a routine action than an active decision for the last while so I just had to remind myself to not grab a bottle to have at lunch. I now drink water instead.

Once the headaches subsided I started to feel better immediately. I don't feel the same bloat from all that carbonation and a couple of pounds have disappeared. I see this all as a good thing. I also burp and fart less at the gym while I'm exercising. Also good in my books.

The best part so far is I am sleeping much better. It took a bit longer for this to kick in as I'm sure there was a lot of caffeine in my body. However, I can once again get deep restful sleep. A couple of days ago I got a lot of deep restful sleep, from 8:30 pm to 6:15 am. I haven't slept like that in a long time. An interesting advantage is my mind seems to be getting sharper again. I've been feeling a bit mushy a lot of the time, probably because I haven't had a lot of good sleep but after a couple of good nights, I feel a lot sharper, a lot more like I used to. For me the sharper I feel the more positive I become and that's been improving as well.

I'm not out of the woods yet. There are some things coming up in my schedule that will test me. I just need to find a way to not give in to the cravings. I can find an alternative or change the situation, depending on what's available. There are also times that a cold Coke would taste really good, again I will have to find a way to not give in.

I realize this is a lot different that a lot of dependancy issues but as I get the evil out of my body I am realizing that the amount of Coca-Cola I was consuming was having an impact on my life. It looks like a good road forward without it.

The whole thing has been made easier by support from friends. Just knowing that someone is willing to help makes any task a lot easier.

Now, I'm not saying you shouldn't drink Coke and I'm not saying I will never have any more in my life but for the time being I can't have any delicious Coke. Even though I know it would taste great, I don't really want to have any at the moment and that's a good thing in my books.

Flip It Over

I think a key to a happy life is to have most of the time in your life with only minor instances of unhappy moments. It's not reasonable to say every minute is going to be a 10 out of 10 but the bad times should be few and far between. If you read anything on happiness, they always tell you do what you like, enjoy the little moments, use your body as it was intended and all that stuff. It's true, that's how you should live to be happy.

For a number of reasons, I am finding the good moments are interspersed in a lot of times I want to forget. I haven't always been like this and I want to get back to how I was.

I have been a gliding instructor for a long time and I still remember one of the first things taught to me about instruction is when you debrief performance you always highlight the good, the areas to improve, and how to improve. So, lets sit down and have an old fashioned debriefing.

The Good

I have great family. Let's be honest, my parents are awesome. They are the old couple that makes you believe you can have true happiness.

I have great friends. The people I met since moving to Ottawa are great and only augment some amazing and lifelong friendships from my pre-Ontario life.

I'm healthy. I don't have much wrong with me other than the occasional bump or nick. Sometimes I enjoy beer too much and pay for it, but I can point to where the pain is coming from.

I'm fit. Almost ten years ago I made a conscious decision to exercise regularly. It has and continues to pay dividends way beyond my investment.

The Areas for Improvement

Work. I haven't been enjoying my job much as of late and it shows. There are a lot of reasons  and I'm part of why it hasn't been awesome.

My Diet. I've been putting a lot of crap, including way too much Coca-Cola into my body lately. It has also become very redundant.

Everything is Unbalanced. Don't get me wrong, I love to fly airplanes but flying and dealing with flying issues has grown to a disproportionately large part of my life.

How To Improve

I can't change the mood of everyone at work. We are in a state of change and uncertainty. It is what it is but I can change my approach to it. Instead of dreading the next thing I can look to be an agent of positive change. I can approach problems as opportunities to help others, which I love to do. I can be a beacon of positive energy. I can start having fun again and find ways to laugh. I can return to the guy who doubts if we can do it and return to the guy who asks how can we make this successful. It's the only way to make it though any job.

I can change what I eat. I know I'm not going to be the guy who makes everything in a Vitamix and never indulges in unhealthy food but if I eat healthier food more often and cut the Coke out (for the record as I write this I am powering though a bit of a caffeine withdrawal headache because I haven't had any Coke for 42 hour) I will feel better. More veggies, reasonable servings of meat, and less processed food in on the horizon.

I think my balance in life will improve slowly. Part of why I have been spending so much time on aircraft stuff is I have been completing a Commercial Aeroplane Pilot Licence. The written exam is finished and the night flying is done. I have about 20 hours to go. It will take a while to get it done as I will be ramping up the flying in my day job over the summer but I think I need to change this to a journey to enjoy not a task to complete and the enjoyment will return. Once the licensing flights are done, I can fly when I want in my off-time to share with others what is so great about aviation in small planes. 

I also need to do more of the things I love to do besides flying. I need to get out and take more pictures, even if it makes me seem busier, it will make me happier.

So, there it is, my personal prescription to a return to happiness. It's going to take time. It's going to take effort. It's not always going to be a smooth transition but the results are going to be worth the effort.

Everything Right and Wrong with Golf

On Friday, I golfed for the first time this summer. I've been busy and time has been flying by. It was nice to get out and have some fun. It was in a best ball tournament which is a good way to start out the year. You are usually not penalized for bad shots as someone will bail you out then you will bail them out.

The good thing about golf is almost anyone can make a really good golf shot.

The bad thing about golf is almost nobody can make really good golf shots consistently.

I made a great drive on one of the holes. Off the tee box I hit it straight down the centre and it went so far the people on the green, that was over 300 yards away, looked back as the ball bounced to within 8 yards of the green.

I also made a few shots so bad it wasn't even worth trying to look for the ball.

That's where golf gets you. You make a couple of shots that will just bring you back. You have those moments that will make you feel like you should be on the tour. As quickly as it happens, you duff a couple or take an exploding diver and your ego crashes back to earth to be live amongst the mortals once again.

I like golf. I don't play as much as I should but I always seem to have fun when I do even though it can make you feel very ordinary very quickly.

Human

I have been busy lately. There has been a lot going on in the office and I have been working on completing the requirements for a commercial pilot licence. I have found that a lot of what has been going on is technical in nature. I'm good with it but sometimes it removes the human side of things. Measuring headings and distances while you calculate intercept angles is not a job about people.

Having said that, every once in a while, no matter how technical things get there are human moments. There are the moments where you see someone you haven't seen for a while or hear about a new achievement of a co-workers's child. These are moments that really make you smile. You don't really need to seek them out they are there. All you need to do is notice them when they happen.

It may simply be that I'm not having as many human moments as usual which makes the ones that happen stand out a bit more. At any rate, they are there. You can see it when a Elvis impersonator is chatting with a couple of teenagers on the street as you walk home. Yo can see it when the summer students are getting a briefing from the Safety Manager in the construction site you walk past every day. It happens when you chat with an acquaintance while you wait for the rain to slow down.

I've been working in a lot of the technical aspects of my job and I think I've noticed more of the human moments in life. I hope I never lose the ability to be a little awestruck by human moments.

Exams

I'm completing a Transport Canada Commercial Pilot License - Aeroplane. There are two testing components, a written test, which must be completed first and a flight test. Yesterday I completed the written test. In case you are wondering I passed, but that's not what this is about.

I completed a four-year degree and that involves writing a lot of exams. They all went the same. Somewhere between one and two hours before the exam I would start to get nervous. It wasn't so much a scared feeling, more of an anxious feeling. Once the exam started I would settle in and get it done. When it would end, I would wind down and always find myself rather tired. It happened over and over again.

Yesterday, it was like I was back in university. The same feelings at the same times. It had been a long time since I had written an exam of that nature and I had forgotten exactly how I reacted but it sure felt familiar when it all started happening again.

It seems that will always be how I react to exams. I don't see this as a bad thing. Maybe its good. I have often told people that if important events don't make you a little bit nervous then they probably aren't worth doing. That's probably true in this case.

It can be easy to slip into a comfortable routine. I was like that until I undertook this project to upgrade my pilot's licence. Now I do feel a lot more alive. I feel like there is a bit of unknown coming and challenges to face. That's a good reason to get up in the morning.

Now the exam is over, the next big rush should come when I do the flight test. I'm hoping the weather and schedule will allow me to be ready for that in early July. Once again I will get nervous before and tired after. I'm ok with it, maybe because it reminds me of when I was younger or maybe because it may open a door to a new adventure some day.

Mom, Dad, and Lucky Ron

One of the things I discovered when I moved to Ottawa was The Lucky Ron Show. It's the same show every week, nothing new or different. It's a one man country act and he plays the really old stuff. If it's from the 60s, it may be too new for him.

Yesterday, I took my parents and they had a blast.

They had flown in so, after their flight was delayed, we dropped their luggage at my place and proceeded directly to The Laff. Thankfully a friend had been holding onto seats for us in the front row because it gets busy, early for Lucky Ron. The usual characters were out. There was Dave the Sound Wizard, Handsome Johnny, and Ron's wife.

Mom and Dad enjoyed their quarts of beer while we waited and chatted. Then the show began and instantly they were whipped up in the frenzy of one of the most bizarre cultural vortexes anywhere. As I have described in previous blog posts the show contains a lot of audience interaction and singing along. Mom and Dad were right into it, even trying to throw cigarettes into his guitar during Tilsonburg. (As a side note nobody managed to get the cigarette in this week, if you do you get 2 shots of Irish whiskey.) They laughed and smiled and enjoyed some beer.

Although I go many weeks, they readily admit that its not something that they would do all the time but I'm sure they will want to go the next time they come to town.

As we hopped into the cab to come home for the night, all of us a bit croaky from being loud and boisterous, we all agreed it was a good time. That's what it's all about, having a good time, a few laughs, and some good music.

Sense of Adventure

If you want to live a great life you need to have a few adventures. It's easy to slip into routine and stick to what you know. There are times you need that as a bit of a break but it can't be ongoing in perpetuity. 

I'm amazed at how many people never look for adventure. I'm even more surprised at how many people decline opportunities for something new when it is presented. I understand if there is a scheduling conflict or something out of your control preventing you from trying something new. I don't understand when people don't have a reason not to try it and still don't take advantage of the opportunity.

I was thinking a bit today how my life would be if I didn't try some things that were presented to me. They lead into each other. and have created a life I think is worth living. Some of the key opportunities were:

I joined Air Cadets as a 12 year old;

I learned to fly gliders at 16 and aeroplanes at 17;

I went to university; and

I took a job in and moved to Ottawa.

There were a lot of other great moments and adventures but those were key and a bit out of my comfort zone. I think learning to fly is a bit out of most people's comfort zone but it's really out there for a teenager. I learned a lot about myself on those courses. Since I still fly today, it's easy to say it was a pivotal in my life but I think it would have been true if I still wasn't flying.

If I didn't learn to fly gliders I wouldn't have gone to university. Now you need to realize that I truly believe a degree doesn't guarantee a job but it does open the door to employers to show off who you are.

Moving to Ottawa has been a big and positive change.  I love living in Sandy Hill and walking to work. I have met many interesting, fun, and talented people. It jsut feels like a great place to live.

All of these and many other adventures were outside my comfort zone. It wasn't that hard to jump in but I never really knew what to expect and not knowing is part of the adventure. It's the part I like because that's where the amazing things happen.

If We Could Change, How Should We?

I've been thinking about change a lot recently. There are a few reasons. The Liberal Party of Canada has chosen a new leader.  I don't specifically speak about work here but change is in the air at the office. It's spring, a season of renewal and change.

Through all this, I'm not sure what would be a good change. Back in the fall of 2010 I started a new job, in a new city, in a new province, in a new region of the country. It was a big change but I can say that I'm happy I made the switch. Overall I think my life is better. There are things I would still change if I had the chance but I can easily say I'm happy with my decision to make a change.

All that being said, I feel that more change is coming. I think it's coming on a national level in that what Canadians want is shifting. I think that it's coming on a personal level in some way shape or form. What I'm not sure of is this feeling coming on because there is a desire for something different or a clear path to something better.

Nationally, I'm starting to sense that Canadian's shifting priorities are ready to focus on something else. We did pretty good getting though the economic setbacks and most people are still above water but I get a sense that Canadians are finding the world a bit bland. They are safe but not inspired. They know its good but don't want to seem to make it great. There is a lot of wait and see instead of lets do something great.

However, maybe that's not most Canadians, maybe it's just me.

I don't seem to have that same adventurous feeling I do at times. I feel like I have to grind through everything. It's not a chore but its not inspired either. It's a follow the rules time not a change the paradigm time.

Another reason is I am getting older. It's nice to be comfortable. It's nice to be stable. It's not exciting and you don't get a rush but you do have a predictable life.

Don't worry, I'm not bummed out and I'm not going to do something stupid or dangerous to feel alive. However, when you spent a lot of your adult life going places on short notice and your plans for the day were often upset for something urgent or exciting opportunities popping up last minute, the predictable life is just that, really predictable.

I don't how how things are going to change, I gave up soothsaying a long time ago. I wasn't very good at it. It is a bit exciting to think there is new different and possibly exciting around the corner even if it may be new but bland. I just have a feeling that we are all going to be looking at some change, in some way coming at us. That is exciting and a bit scary, as it should be.